They need better titles for horror movies!

Horror movies aren’t like what they used to be. Horror movies produced nowadays are MOSTLY not scary, and are predictable. And I’m talking about the Japanese and Korean horror films. Almost all the horror movies produced are the same. Steaming piles of bullshit!

It all started with ‘The Ring’, which was indeed quite scary. And then, people start coming up with all sorts of other bullshit like ‘The Eye’, ‘Dark Water’, ‘One Missed Call’, ‘Ring 0′, ‘Wishing stairs’, ‘The Eye 10′, ‘One Missed Call 2′, ‘Ghost Train’, and ‘Infection’. All part of an epic plot to rape people off their cash to watch different movies with near similar storylines. And what’s up with the titles?! Can’t they think of something apart from those stupid lines? What next? ‘The Finger’?!

Almost all these movies feature a girl dresssed in white, with her long hair covering her face, appearing at some dark area, getting closer and closer towards the screen. Also, there is usually a ghost that crawls on the ground, making scratching noises as it moves. Another normalcy is a ghost that crawls on the ceiling, and dangles upside-down on unsuspecting people below. And also, most commonly, KIDS! When was the last time you’ve seen a horror movie that doesn’t have a scary little kid in it? GIMME A BREAK, DAMMIT! If they keep using the same shit over and over again, people are gonna get sick of horror movies pretty soon! They better be thinking of new ideas, cause the old ones are bloody stale.

As if that isn’t bad enough, Western directors film a remake of the movies in English, which greatly watered down the scariness by at least 80%, so that people who don’t understand foreign languages do not have to read the subtitles. What’s the point?! Somebody answer me, dammit! It all began with the remake of ‘The Ring’, which was so fucking boring and lame. Western directors can never make a horror movie as scary as the Japanese and Koreans can. They should go back to filming something they are good at, like sci-fi or action or comedy, or even revert back to the old days, and make shitty silent movies, featuring William Hung as Charlie Chaplin, or some crap like that.

One more problem with the remakes is that the actresses in the remakes look so fucking ugly compared to the actresses in the original versions. There are loads of pretty girls in America, but they use the ugly ones to star in these movies. What the hell is up with that?! Too poor to pay for the pretty ones?! Go to hell already, dammit!

~Horror film directors think I’m full of shit~

Don’t entertainment magazines have anything else to talk about?!

Honestly speaking, entertainment magazines aren’t like what they used to be. They only focus on certain incidents nowadays, limiting their content. What these dipshits are missing is variety. Not only that, we have many different entertainment magazines nowadays publishing the same bullshit. Dude… What the hell?!

Nowadays, entertainment magazines publish the same news over and over again. At one time, some rubbish about American Idol was published over 6 CONSECUTIVE ISSUES! Gimme a break, dammit! Here’s a short list of stuff that are reported in almost every issue nowadas!

~ American Idol (Boring!)

~ Michael Jackson’s life

~ J Lo’s one year marriage with Mark Anthony

~ Star Wars

~ The Brad Pitt and angelina Jolie scandal

~ Jennifer Aniston’s confession on divorce

~ That idiot who acts in the movie ‘Stealth‘

~ Tom Cruise and his new found love

~ Gwen Stefanie

~ Guys whom people find to be hot (ie. John Johnson, Tom Welling, and Wade Robson)

~ Malaysian and Singapore Idol (Boring too!)

~ Marion Raven (This, I don’t mind. But just for the record)

~ The Faders (Unfortunately)

~ The Backstreet Boys reunion

~ Rumours about the Spice Girls planning to get together again (NOOOOOO!)

~ Initial D

Entertainment magazines should really add some colour to their work. If they keep writing the same crap over and over again, people are bound to get sick of it sooner or later. These writers lack creativity. There are a whole lot of other things to write about, but they do not think outside the box. They are the same type of people who learn how to fry eggs, and eats fried eggs for the rest of their lives, finally getting sick of eggs and suffering from high blood pressure! Zero Variety!

The Rubber Wrist Band Conspiracy

~Observe these bands, and the words written on them~

I’ve noticed that trends aren’t what they use to be. Nowadays, people put on all sorts of funny accessories to keep up with, what they claim to be, up-to-date fashion. And then, out pops the silicone rubber wrist band. This new fashion statement shall be known as the ‘Rubber Wrist Band Conspiracy’, or proof that money can’t buy common sense. It’s a conspiracy made up by people who wear rubber wristbands against those who don’t.

Many people are wearing at least one of these bands nowadays. Even worse are the people who wear more than two on each arm. It is a conspiracy that has no bounds. How fashionable can rubber be? It is just a thick rubber band with a word printed on it, and yet, people think that by wearing one, it makes them look ‘hip’.

Usually, these bands are printed with a positive word or phrase. By wearing them, people make it look as if they need to be reminded about positivity. And isn’t it obvious that these bands are cheap? It probably only costs about 40 cents to manufacture, but they sell it to people for prices ranging between 3 to 5 bucks. They have brainwashed people into believing that wearing a piece of cheap plastic around the wrist is an up-to-date fashion. Nobody in their right frame of mine would buy these bands.

There are other stuff printed on some of the bands as well, including the logo of companies, as well as words like ‘vegan’ and ‘blood donor’, which really doesn’t matter to the people around. This is the modern day mentality. People think that anything with a renowned company logo on it is good in terms of quality and looks, even though that thing is full of shit. And to make things crappier, these items usually cost alot! Imagine this. A plain, cheap, coloured rubber band is worth chicken feed. But a Nike logo on it can send its price soaring! Get what I mean?

I can’t believe how people gullibly assimilate this rubbish. The last time I recall, rubber bands were used by girls to tie their hair. Don’t be influenced by this bullshit. Get your own style, and be yourself. Don’t buy these lousy bands just to keep up with the trend. Anyone out there with me? Drop me a line and tell me that I’m not alone in this matter!

~People who bought coloured wrist bands think I am an asshole~

If you can’t think of anything better to say to your girl on a date, shut up!

I don’t understand how some guys can be so fucking stupid! They go on dates with their girlfriends, and most of them let their stupidity show as visibly as shit in a septic tank! They shoot their mouths with the most unintelligent talk, and suprisingly, their girlfriends bother to tag along. What is this world coming to? I’ve heard guys say tonnes of bullshit to their girlfriends… So much, that you can gather them up, and compile them to make the full lyrics for all the songs in the next Blue album! The problem is that when guys run out of things to say to their girlfriends, a majority of them will shoot their mouth with crap, hoping to keep it going. Instead of shutting the hell up, and thinking of an intelligent topic, they do the exact opposite! Man, I hate people! Here are a few examples of the shit that guys say, along with a brief description. NOTE! ALL OF THE FOLLOWING LINES ARE REAL! I HAVE HEARD THEM BEING SAID BEFORE!

~ "You know, my ex-girlfriend has the same name as you do"

Pfft! What a crock! So what if your ex-girlfriend has the same name as your current girlfriend? Do you think your current girlfriend gives a shit about it?! In fact, you’d only make her feel insecure, knowing that your ex and her coincidentally have the same name.

~ "You are so nice to touch" *Touches the girls*

You horny piece of shit! Looking for every opportunity to touch your girlfriend… Keep your hands to yourself, dipshit.

~ "Why are you so beautiful?"

Owh, I don’t know…… Maybe because she’s born like that?! Sheesh….. How dumb can one get?!

~ "You rock my world"

Right…… She rocks your world…… Here’s 3 important points:

1) How exactly can a girl rock your world? Dipshit.

2) Do you need a Richter Scale to measure all that rocking?

3) This is not your world! This world belongs to everyone, not you alone.

I think ya’ll understand what I’m trying to say.

~ "What are you doing now?"

HOLY SHIT! I thought this line was only used in online chatrooms and communication. Well, seems like that no longer applies. What the hell do you think she’s doing when you ASK HER THAT QUESTION ON A DATE, when she is right in front of your damn face?! wasting her time with a shit like you, that’s what she’s doing!

~ "You are the sweetest girlfriend I’ve known!"

If there’s one thing a guy should know, it’s to never talk about his past relationships to his current girlfriend! But they still talk about it anyways, thinking that women are actually as open-minded as they claim themselves to be.

~ "Nice necklace. Where’d you get it?"

Hmm…. And why exactly do you want to know where she got that necklace? Planning to buy it? who do you intend to buy it for? Her? I doubt it, since she already has that necklace. Dumbass! It’s not like you are going to go to the store to get her the same necklace! So, why bother asking?!

~ "When I first saw you, Cupid’s arrow hit my heart"

Frivolous talk. There is no such thing as love at first sight. Just a sudden emotional attraction. That’s not called love, and Cupid doesn’t play a role here. And Cupid must be blind, because he seem to be match-making more and more WRONG COUPLES! Cupid’s arrow hit your heart? Too bad the arrow wasn’t real.

Find out more about the non-existence of love at first sight in my ‘dictionary of stupid pathetic quotes’ post by clicking here.

~ "You make my life worth living"

And what happens if she leaves you? Moron!

~ "I can’t keep my eyes off you"

You don’t need to eat, sleep, or take a shit. Just keep your eyes on her 24/7!

~ "I’d give up all my money for you"

Hmm….. You’d really think that she’ll be with you through thick and thin? Hahahahahahahaha! STOP, PLEASE! I’m running out of breath from laughing! As if she’ll wanna be with you if you don’t have money.

~ "I’ll do anything for you"

And she says "Pick the moon and stars off the sky for me". And when that happens, feel free to lie down on your bed with your thumb in your mouth, thinking about the true extent of your love for her!

~ "You’re always on my mind"

Right. She’s always on your mind! In fact, because of her being always on your mind, you have no room for more important things, like… I don’t know… your job, friends and family?! Give me a break!

~ "I wish I can show you my heart"

NEED I SAY MORE?

~ "I love you to bits"

I think I have made my point…

Here’s an intelligent quote:

" I can’t go on any longer! There is just too much bullshit from guys nowadays!"

-Guys hate me for rendering their date conversation backup lines obsolete-

Self enrichment on love is synonymous to ‘Stupid Bullshit’!

I seriously don’t understand what the hell is up with people nowadays. It is like they have nothing better to do with their lives. They think that being an author gives them the right to talk out of their asses. So, they write shitty self enrichment books on how to deal with love and relationships. And some of them are not the constructive type!

What these idiots do is simply unbelievable! They use the following concept to their sick advantage!

Okay, here’s how the concept works. The minds of people nowadays are like fresh pieces of toilet paper. And society is a big blubbering ass! And ass that takes a dump as much as a few times a day. and what happens after this ass takes shits? It wipes itself with the readily available toilet paper (i.e. the minds of everybody except me). And when this happens, people actually become the shit, gullibly devouring every scrap of crap they find. And you know damn well that toilet paper tainted with shit can never be cleaned, even if you wash it with water!

Have I made myself clear, or do I have to author a shitty book for you to read in order to understand my point? Dumbass authors nowadays are writing bullshit in their books just to make a few extra cents. They come up with crap like ‘40 sure ways for a lady to stay single’, and ‘How to survive divorce’. What the hell? as if there isn’t enough shit in society already, they add to it! I was at the bookstore the other day, and I saw these books at the self enrichment section. They were the biggest crock of shit I have ever seen! I nearly had to pour sulfuric acid in my eyes to cleanse them of the crap I saw. And it was just the cover of the books!

These books seriously pollute people’s minds! I especially hate that stupid book on 40 ways for a lady to stay single! What a crock! Sure we live in a world where modern women are independant, or what they call girl power(a.k.a. FEMINIST QUOTE). But, does that mean that women should remain single?! Instead of encouraging women to find love, dumbass authors think that it would be better for women to live life alone. And have these feminist cocks thought of it from a guy’s point of view? HELL NO! Imagine if a guy really likes a girl, and tries to make a move. but instead, the answer he gets is "Sorry… A book I read says that women are better off being single". Imagine how crushed the guy would be. But then, feminists will always be feminists, even though it is an obvious fact that the author of these books most likely have a HUSBAND in real life!!! AND YES! I SAID HUSBAND, AND NOT WIFE, BACAUSE A GUY WOULD NEVER WRITE SHIT THAT WOULD ENCOURAGE LADIES TO BE SINGLE!!!

SELF ENRICHMENT BOOKS ON LOVE ARE A CROCK OF SHIT! BURN THEM!!!

Owh, and by the way, to all you feminists out there.

My gift to you!