If you want to speak in English, the least you could do is use the proper words, dammit!
My friend (name omitted) sent me a URL the other day about some Japanese girl’s website, so I decided to have a look at it. The URL directed me to a web page that is pink and purple, with hearts and shit, and the worst selection of words I have seen! And, let’s not forget a whole lot of visually revealing pictures! Still don’t know what the hell I am talking about? Well, check out this picture of the website heading, and you might get a rough idea of the topic at hand.
I’m sure that picture has already jump-started the loins of some of you sick cocks out there. Get that thought out of your head! You know what you should do next?
VISIT THAT WEBSITE BY CLICKING HERE! (Right click on the ‘HERE’, and choose ‘open in new window’. Believe me. It’s much more convenient that way)
Dammit! Are some people really that ignorant to not know how to use the word ‘cat’?! Just look at those dumbass captions!
~ Many people send me pictures of their pussy for me to look at!
~ Here are two chubby young pussy!
~ Here is pussy that belongs to new email friend Aya! Look at how all the dogs look at her pussy! They are hungry to eat it! Please don’t stare!
~ How else do you wash dirty pussy!
~ This pussy gets very tired from watching pictures on computer!
~ Squish the face! Pussy finally comes out of closet!
~ More of Aya’s pussy. Oh oh! It was caught in act!
~ Pussy toll!
Just when I thought I’ve seen more crap than I can handle, I noticed a few links at the top left side of the web page, so I clicked on it. Big mistake! I find another barrage of pictures and captions forcing an extra serving of bullshit strokinoff into my eyes! Just just so much crap that it seemed almost impossible to list out! But I’d be damned if I wasn’t going to try! So, here goes:
~ When I visted family over summer i found out daddy bought pussy while I was away and didn’t tell me when I called! Mommy said Naru’s was enough, but daddy demand and so mommy said okay.
~ My daddy missed my pussy, so once I came home he started playing with it right away.
~ On plane trip home I make this. Origami is fun to do. Man next to me must have saw me make it, because he said "I give you money for pussy" and so I said okay and then made it for him. He looked a little sad, maybe he misses kitty at home?
~ I found this old picture in my computer at home. It was when I went over to friends home (She has two pussies!) when I just got my furry love (she makes up nickname) and I ask for how to take care of it!
~ I find this cute. It is also old picture, my dad even in the car is obsess with pussy.
~ Aa~! It is youngest picture I can find of my pussy.
~ Gothic Rorita style my friend makes for her pussy.
~ I saw this in the street one time, so I took a picture of it. The pussy will come home dirty if it stays in the street too long.
~ On Tatami mats sometimes pussys come out to play?
~ Doctor Pussy is always available to see you!
If you have problems locating the links, they look like this:
or CLICK HERE for the page
Phew….. Glad that’s over……. HOLY SHIT! There’s more!
~ One the first pictures of my pussy. My dad always peeks at it in bed. Sometimes he takes cell phone pictures to show his friends at work!
~ My pussy looks like this a lot. It is like it is sorry for being so bad!
~ Another picture of my pussy on the couch.
~ Sometimes my pussy gets into the food and then it falls asleep.
~ Here is picture of my friend pussy spread out on carpet. It’s so fuzzy, I just want to pet it!
~ Here is a really cute picture my friend sent me, the pussy is sprawled on the floor ready to be picked up and petted! Haha!
~ My friend sometimes keeps pussy in his napsack so he can play with it during long trips! It’s so cute!
~ I forget where I get this, but it is so cute to see pussy wrapped up, is like spanish burrito. Just put pussy in your mouth! Haha.
~ Oh oh! This pussy is not very hairy and is very frisky! Jealous of other pussy in the house! Please keep your pussy away!
~ Pussy call! Please pick up!
~ Pussy in the box! Please wipe it with a blanket if it is too fuzzy! Is this not cute? I want to hold it!
~ My friends white pussy is always so exciteable, so it gets tired fast.
~ This is not pussy, but it is so cute! I think I found this on internet.
CLICK HERE for the page
Damn, man! That’s one big crock of shit! How can a girl write stuff like that? So, I checked out her profile to find the source of such violation of language, and what do I get? Another volley of bullshit that would have killed me if it weren’t for my high bullshit tolerence! Here’s her profile:
Profile About Naru
Hello! My name is Naru and I recently moved here from Japan to study English in America! The number one thing to follow me is my pussy. When I got to airport, I had to give my pussy one last look before I got on the place. It was fuzzy as always, I smoothed out it’s fur and then got on the plane.
During plane ride I sat near man who was very interest to hear about me, and he ask to see my pussy, but I told him it was downstairs. He said he knew that. I think he did not know I could not visit it to bring it to my seat? He was a little idiot? But that is all to say about plane. I sleep a lot.
I go to university in New York. I enjoy the learning but I find it difficult. English is my passion, but grammar is difficult to understand for me. I move here on savings I had for 2 years in Osaka. So I come here with no job in mind, but still need a little bit extra I think. I am only stayin a year. But there are so many objects I want to purchase. I will buy them later perhaps before I leave.
This is my website which is idol shrine to my pussy. Please enjoy the pictures I give you, and maybe if you smile donate some to me. I would really enjoy to have enough to afford cable television, so many channels I go "Uwaaahhh" when I see my furends have it. So please see the internet website and I hope you enjoy it.
You can access the profile by CLICKING HERE
"English is my passion", my ass! What sort of passion could she possibly have for English if she doesn’t know how to use a simple, three-letter word that starts with ‘C’ and ends with ‘AT’? Went to America to study English, did you? "excellent" progression with the language. Good job, moron! And by saying that the man sitting near you was a little idiot, don’t you actually mean that he’s just a little unsure about the matter? I hope your furends are not little idiot too. And just for the record, you really need drastic improvements in your grammar. You remind me of all those people that type comments in my online journal with rubbish like ‘lah’ and ‘mah’ and shit like that. If you can’t use proper English, DON’T! Do I have to spoon-feed everything to you retards?!
In the interest of helping out Naru, I have made a profile for her, with hopes that it might help her with her website in the future. It goes like this:
Profile about Naru
Hello! My name is Naru, but you can call me dipshit because of the fact that I don’t know a simple word called ‘cat’. I recently moved to America from Japan to study English, but apparently my savings of 2 years for this great educational experience is going to be wasted. The one thing I bring along is my pet cat. All do all sorts of lovey-dovey shit to it before I board the plane, as animals are not allowed in the aircraft cabin.
During the flight, I sat near a man who was very interested to hear about me. He asked to see my "pussy". But then, I was too damn stupid, and thought that he was actually talking about my pet cat. So I told him that I cannot visit it during the flight. Somehow, he knew that it was "downstairs". Then, I started folding origami cats from bullshit toilet paper. The man said he will give me money for "pussy", so I made him a paper cat. No wonder he looked sad. He payed to see MY "pussy", not to see some stupid origami of a cat! I have legally raped him off his money. I still debate on who is the little idiot. Me or him? Anyways, that’s all I have to say about the plane trip. I sleep alot, not that anybody gives a shit.
I go to university in New York. English is my passion, but I still suck ass! Once again, my 2 years of savings are most likely going to a waste. I have no job, little cash, and did I mention I also have crappy English? There are so many things I want to buy, and I might buy them before I leave. Strangely, most of the products I want to purchase has a label that says "Made in Japan". What does that mean anyways?
Anyways, this website of mine is a shrine to my pet cat. I hope that if the pictures in here made you smile, you will donate some cat pictures and lots of cash to me, just so that I can afford cable television. Many of my friends (or are they called furends? I’m not sure myself) have cable television, and it’s making me feel horny since I can’t afford it. So please enjoy this website.
There you have it! An improved profile! I hope it adds the word ‘cat’ to your pool of knowledge, in interests of your vocabulary expansion.
Owh, and by the way,
This is cruelty towards animals by defination! I really wonder how much you could love your pussy! Just wait till the people at PETA find out about this, and start eating real "pussies" in front of your house in protest!
~ Wankers have visited this post in hopes of finding some "pussies" to stroke at ~
